Crossfire
by What's Written in the Stars
Summary: Katniss never destroyed the force field in the arena, instead she became the only Victor of the 75th Hunger Games. Peeta died in the Games and Katniss hardly handles it. But, as another year rolls around and a new Hunger Games, Katniss thought she had enough of her plate when Peeta comes back alive and well. But he's not the Peeta Katniss new. The Capitol changed him.


**_ E_**

**CHAPTER ONE**

"_Peeta!"_ His name leaves my lips, jolting me from my nightmare and into reality. For a moment I am frozen in place, expecting an enemy to emerge from the jungle and strike me down. But nothing happens because I am not in the Arena. I'm safe and sound in District 12.

But there is no comfort in waking up. Peeta doesn't run through my door to see what was wrong. He isn't able to stay with me and help chance the nightmare away. I call out his name, not because I am hoping he will burst through my doors and share my bed. I call out his name, the same way I sometimes call out Rue's. Because I failed to save him.

The cold sweat beads down my forehead, a familiar sensation I have grown accustom too.

My mother and Prim don't rush in when they hear my scream, they know it's better if I deal with it alone. I don't refuse because I can't say I don't agree. These nightmares are my burden, I should not push them on the shoulders of my loved ones.

With a peek out my window, I see dawn in approaching.

Normally I would be up, slipping on my hunting boots and jacket, reading to enter the forest with Gale to hunt. But I do not remove myself from under the covers. Hunting is no longer a safe-haven for either of us. The coal mines are pulling double-shifts and the fence surrounding the district is now on twenty-four-seven.

All of us are trapped in a cage with no hope for escape.

I wish I had died in the Games. Even if I couldn't save Peeta, I don't want to be awake to deal with the grief every day.

When I first returned home, I was too numb to think about anything. Both my mother and Prim had to become my puppet-masters, make me move so I wouldn't spend the rest of my life curled up in a blanket on my bed. It was only a few months later, after my brain decided it wanted to work, did I realized why I was the only surviving Victor from the Games.

At first Snow was trying to kill me. He wanted to smother the flame that sparked the beginning of a rebellion. I don't know what changed his mind, but suddenly everyone around me was dying and I could do nothing to help them. The few allies I made screamed for help but I stared helplessly.

Finnick, the Victor from District 4 was the worst. It was after the Mocingjay attack where I thought Prim was being tortures and Finnick thought his love from back home was, did I see who he really was. Not a pretty-boy the capitol labeled him as, but another broken man from the games who cared only for a mad girl.

The monkeys attacked at the wrong time in the wrong place, we were expecting the blood rain instead. But, suddenly they were all around us. I managed to kill the ones clawing at the other Victors but before I could withdraw another arrow, the monkey had won the battle over Finnick. I shouldn't have allowed myself to befriend any of them.

A sigh parts my lips and I slip out of my covers, allowing the cold morning air to attack my bare legs. I made a promise to myself that I would try to push forward, and make it look like I was doing my best to make things better. Prim and my mother deserve that much. Since I am up, I decided to make breakfast. We are fully stocked with items, since I am a Victor who has now won two Hunger Game, we are stocked up to our necks in food.

Prim wakes up first, a small smile on her face once she sees me making a plate for myself. "Moring, little duck." These words are about the only ones that come to me with ease.

She sits upon a stood as I gather this morning breakfast onto her plate.

The smile soon falls from her lips as she quietly eats her food. At fourteen I cannot believe how much she's grown. Watching me play in the games twice forced her to grow up too fast in case I never returned. I see it sometimes with our mother. Prim, so nurturing and good. Sometimes I wonder how the two of us are related.

"Hey." I say nudging her after the silence started to ring in my ear. "What's wrong?"

"Do you know what today is?"

I shake my head. I don't keep track anymore because there really isn't a point. This was my life. I was going to die in this house, the house I didn't want.

"Katniss, today is the Reaping."

For a moment I say nothing because I don't believe it's been a year. But, with a quick calculation I realize the few months I thought it took me to get a hold of myself had been _many. Too many._ "No." I breathe dropping my fork on my plate.

Suddenly Prim is twelve again facing her first Reaping.

I look into her eyes and see the same fear from that day. She might act a lot older than she should, but she's still a child, barely fourteen.

Her name is only in there three times, the odds of her being chosen again are against her.

_That's what you thought last time. _I shake the thought from my mind.

I am no longer able to stomach anymore food and push away my plate. I regret getting out of bed today and want nothing more than to crawl back under the covers with Prim wrapped in my arms. I cannot think about losing her when I was still getting over the fact I lost Peeta.

To lose them both.

I would not survive

The next few hours I spend with Prim after the two of us shower. I braid her hair like I used to braid mine, only one pony tail instead of two. I pin mine up, no use in braiding it when I no longer hunt, and throw on the simplest thing I own for clothing. I still hold on to a few beautiful gowns Cinna made me but I don't dare put them on.

Even though my name is no longer in the Reaping, I am forced to attend and stand by with Haymitch as the _"lucky"_ two tributes are chosen.

It's only when there is about an hour until the Reaping do I remember I have to meet up with the other Capitol people. A knock at the door from a pair of Peacekeepers forces me to kiss the top of Prim's head and tell her not to worry before I leave, my feet dragging the whole way.

"I'm surprised you haven't succumb to the beautiful taste of the drink." Is the first thing Haymitch greets me with as we stand on the stage awaiting Effie. There is a bottle in his hand and the scent of gin on his breath.

"Believe it or not, Haymitch a lot of people like being sober."

"But a lot of people aren't like you and me." He's got me there. I cannot deny that I'd been tempted to join him late at night because I can't stand another night of nightmares.

I look at the other Victor and the drunken mess he is in. Loosing Peeta fucked with him more than I would have imagined. The second night he was back, I found Haymitch passed out outside the house that belonged to Peeta. (It's been locked since he died and his family forced to move back to their old home) Haymitch kept blubbering words I was unable to make out, but somehow I knew they were about Peeta.

"Can I tell you somethin'?" He slurs, stepping closer to me, adding distance between the Peacekeepers. He does not await for an answer before he is leaning in, his gin breathe almost topic. "I just pissed myself."

Almost instantly I push him away disgusted. I still do not understand why they insist on Haymitch being present for the Reaping. He does nothing but make a fool out of himself and the District. He is better off a drunken mess behind closed doors.

The siren rings the moment Effie is in the building. She sees the two of us and offers a very small smile. Unlike two years ago, she no longer offers a cheery pep-talk about the Capitol. Even she is seeing the cruelty of it but is unable to say a word against it without losing her head. She stops in front of us, close enough I can see the reapplied makeup from the trail tears made.

To stop myself from adding my own tears to this day, I step forward and throw my arms around her, embracing her in a hug. "It's good to see you." I say.

Effie says nothing but offers me a squeeze before the two of us step back.

I cannot help but notice how simple she is dressed today. The colors are still wild. Her wig a strange shade of yellow, but the dress that hugs her body only has a small design on it that represents the Capitol. "You look nice." I add, and let a smile bloom on to my face as Effie fluffs her hair and says a very loud thank you.

Another siren plays and the three of us step out of the Justice building and onto the stage, Haymitch and I stepping to the left as Effie moves to stand in front of the microphone. Out of habit, I zone everything out, the speech from Effie, and the national anthem.

"Now, for the tributes." There was a pause before Effie stepped to the right grabbing for the bowl of male's instead of females. Her hand digs into the bowl. She withdraws a slip and ever boy in the crowed holds their breath.

"Ashton Hillyard." A moment later, a fifteen or so boy steps out of the crowed, his face is pale, his eyes focused on his feet.

Once he is on stage Effie strolls over to the other glass bowl where the female names lie. For the first time in what feels like forever, my name is not among those names. She dips her hand in and pulls out a slip. The moment she opens it, I can see her face flush, even under all that make up.

_No._ I think because I know whose name is on that slip of paper.

Again.

"Primrose Everdeen."

I can't help the scream that leaves my lips. It's not her name, it's barely a sound. But, no eyes are on my, they are all on my sister who walks up to the stage. Her face is pale white, but her head is held high and this makes the sight even worse.

Before I know what I am doing, I rush forward and snatch the piece of paper from Effie's hand, rereading the name over and over again.

This cannot be happening again.

My hand is suddenly in the fishbowl and I pull out another and another, all of them reading Prim's name.

There was no way she was going to escape this year's games.

Snow was still punishing me.

He wanted me to survive the games; not just to take Peeta away.

But to break me by taking away my sister.

The only person I am certain I love.


End file.
